Living Christian in a Gay World, part 1 - Love is the Key

Part 1 – Love is the Key
1 Corinthians 13:4-10

Introduction

            Love wins.  It was the slogan that rang out on social media, in news clips, and on banners all over our nation when the Supreme Court of the United States released their ruling on the legality of gay marriage on Friday, June 26, 2015.  The verdict, in a 5-4 decision, ruled that States cannot keep same-sex couples from marrying and must recognize their unions.  The decision polarized people in our country more than ever before.  People advocating for gay rights were jubilant while those against the ruling were angry, afraid, saddened, and deeply concerned for our nation.  One thing the ruling points out is just how far public opinion on the issue of homosexuality has shifted over the years.
            The United Methodist Church has prayed about, studied, and debated the issue of homosexuality since at least 1968.  The best minds and hearts of our communion have spoken consistently about homosexuality in a way I believe speaks the truth with love.  Our denomination’s official stance from the 2012 Book of Discipline states:

“Although all persons are sexual beings whether or not they are married, sexual relations are affirmed only with the covenant of monogamous, heterosexual marriage…  We affirm that all persons are individuals of sacred worth, created in the image of God. All persons need the ministry of the Church in their struggles for human fulfillment, as well as the spiritual and emotional care of a fellowship that enables reconciling relationships with God, with others, and with self. The United Methodist Church does not condone the practice of homosexuality and considers this practice incompatible with Christian teaching. We affirm that God’s grace is available to all. We will seek to live together in Christian community, welcoming, forgiving, and loving one another, as Christ has loved and accepted us.  We implore families and churches not to reject or condemn lesbian and gay members and friends. We commit ourselves to be in ministry for and with all persons.”  [For the full statement and other statements in the United Methodist Book of Disciplines related to homosexuality, click here]

            That being said, there is disagreement among people within our denomination about homosexuality.  Some hold to the view presented in our discipline.  Others believe the denomination needs to change its stance and discard the idea that the practice of homosexuality is a sin.  Opinions of United Methodists in the Bible belt of the southeast tend to be more conservative—holding to the traditional view—while opinions in the northeast and western jurisdictions advocate for the ordination of self-avowed, practicing homosexuals as ministers in the UMC.  The opinions of most United Methodist in areas outside of the US—places such as Africa, Asia, and Latin America where the church is growing exponentially—conform to the traditional view that the practice of homosexuality is a sin and should not be condoned by the church.

            Our next General Conference—which meets every four years and is the only legislative body that can speak for the United Methodist Church as a whole—will meet this May and most certainly will discuss the subject of homosexuality and how our denomination should respond to the changing tide of public opinion on this issue.  I invite you—regardless of your opinion on the issue—to be in prayer for our leaders at General Conference that God would give them great wisdom to lead our denomination regarding homosexuality.

            I have been praying for several months about whether or not to preach on this subject and, if so, how.  Although this is a difficult subject and one that often stirs up strong reactions, I believe it is imperative for us to seek understanding from God.  Thus, I want to ask you to commit to be present for (or read) each of the messages in this series.  Over the next few weeks, we will consider what God would say about homosexuality and how Jesus wants us to live in a world that that has changed its attitudes about those who are gay. 

Love is the Key

The time we spend here considering how to live as Christians in a gay world will only be productive if we love one another.  Love is the key.  So let us first consider how the Bible teaches us to love as we read in 1 Corinthians 13:4-10. 

1 Corinthians 13:4-10 [Slides]

⁴ Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud ⁵ or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. ⁶ It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. ⁷ Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.

⁸ Prophecy and speaking in unknown languages and special knowledge will become useless. But love will last forever! ⁹ Now our knowledge is partial and incomplete, and even the gift of prophecy reveals only part of the whole picture! ¹⁰ But when the time of perfection comes, these partial things will become useless. 

Now, let’s examine some of these aspects of love more closely. 

Love is patient and kind.

We may be tempted to dehumanize people with whom we disagree about hot topics like homosexuality.  “How can anyone believe that!” we think.  “They must be stupid or mean or evil!”  But love requires us to be patient with people you think just don’t get it and gentle with folks whose religion or faith seems weaker than yours.  You see, love is patient and kind, not fed up and mean. 

Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude.

Don’t be jealous when other people or groups seem to win and you lose.  It was really hard for me to see gay rights activist marching in parades celebrating their victory with the Supreme Court.  The slogan "Love Wins" seemed like a slap in the face, as if I don't love because of my position.  All this at a time when many felt like their country was falling apart.  It was hard not to be “jealous” in a sense.  It was hard not to lash out in anger, but love isn't "jealous".  On the other hand, love isn’t boastful and does not swell with pride over perceived victories—rubbing your victory in the noses of those you’ve defeated.  It is very difficult not to be rude in the midst of such critical fights as come up over serious issues like homosexuality, but love is not rude. 

Love does not demand its own way. Love is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged.

Love doesn’t demand people to see things or do things our way.  We should make our case—reasoning with people—hoping they will come around to our way of thinking, but it’s their decision.  And love means that we let people follow their own path and not become irritated when they don’t follow ours.  Furthermore, we don’t hold a grudge against people we love when their beliefs clash with our own or when we feel mistreated.  It’s not easy, but love is worth it. 

Love does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. 

Ultimately, what we really want is for injustice to vanish and for truth to win.  Yet sometimes pride disrupts this aspect of love.  We want to be right; we want to win.  And sometimes, the harder we fight to be right (and the more people we can get to agree with us that we are right) the more our selfish pride can blind us to the fact that we might just be wrong.  And it might just be sometimes that our desire or desperate need to be right starts to overshadow our love.  True love—in the biblical sense—rejoices when the truth wins out even if we have to admit we were wrong.

In regards to the issue of homosexuality, I find myself praying fervently about the fact that I might be wrong.  I don’t think I’m wrong.  I’ve taken great care to study, and meditate, and pray about, and research, and listen, and learn as much as I can about this issue so that I can be as confident as possible in my understanding.  Yet I never want to feel like the case is closed and so shut my mind or my heart to what someone else has to say.  Although I know what I believe, I always want to listen in case God shows me something I’ve missed.  You see, this is a serious issue that affects scores of people at a very deep level.  It has broken families apart, driven some to suicide and others to brutality or murder.  Yet my role as a Christian (and especially a Christian leader) requires me to have an opinion, to lead our church according to God’s will, and to take a stand the best I know how.  The love of Christ compels me.  And yet, I also understand all too well the disturbing reality that I could be wrong. 

If one day find that I was wrong, I hope that those with whom I disagreed will have mercy and forgive me because I was only trying to do what I thought was right.  In turn, I want to be merciful with those I disagree with now--treating them the way I would want them to treat me if the shoe was on the other foot.

I pray your most earnest desire as we go through this study is—not to be right and not to win, but—to rejoice whenever the Truth wins out even if it means you’ve been wrong. 

Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.

Living as a Christian in our world requires faith, courage, and perseverance.  It requires us—with God’s help—to live out the principles Christ gave us the best we know how.  It requires us to have the courage to uphold the truth even if everyone else disagrees (or to be willing to change if we discover we were wrong).  Our faith requires us to persevere through it all—regardless of the difficulties—because we trust Jesus. 

Love will last forever.

All our understanding is limited.  Even what we know for sure will one day become irrelevant.  The same is true of our power, our influence, our traditions, our ways of life…  The only thing that will be left is love.  Therefore, we must make love our highest aim.  For if we are right, but without love, we have nothing.  And even if we are mistaken, but full of love, we are better off; because, one day our mistakes will be washed away, but love will remain forever. 

Summary

            Love is the key.  So in closing, I want to summarize the loving attitudes that will serve you best over the next few weeks as we consider how to live Christian in a gay world.  Really, these attitudes will serve you well in many areas of your life.  So, I encourage you to:

1.     Keep an open mind and a humble heart.

2.     Even if you don’t agree, try to at least understand someone else’s point of view.  I find that I learn more from people with whom I disagree than from those with whom I agree.  It doesn't mean I accept what they say, but sometimes understanding the position of those with whom I disagree clarifies why I believe what I believe.  Perhaps it will for you too.

3.     Remember, this is a safe place.

o   It is a place where you can come open your heart to God and listen for His guidance,

o   where you can agree or disagree, knowing God loves you either way,

o   where you can let God change your mind and heart or find He confirms what you already knew. 

Invitation

            I invite you to come to Pleasant Grove UMC for each of the messages in this series—with an open mind and a humble heart (or read each message here on this blog over the next few weeks).  I invite you to seek to be more loving, as spelled out in 1 Corinthians 13.  Most importantly, I invite you to ask Jesus to take control of your life and to commit to follow Him.   Christ is the embodiment of love--proven when he gave his life for us on the cross.

I'll Be Home for Christmas, Part 3 - Grief

Isaiah 61:1-3

¹The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is upon me,
    for the Lord has anointed me
    to bring good news to the poor.
He has sent me to comfort the brokenhearted
    and to proclaim that captives will be released
    and prisoners will be freed.
² He has sent me to tell those who mourn
    that the time of the Lord’s favor has come,
    and with it, the day of God’s anger against their enemies.
³ To all who mourn in Israel,
    he will give a crown of beauty for ashes,
a joyous blessing instead of mourning,
    festive praise instead of despair.
In their righteousness, they will be like great oaks
    that the Lord has planted for his own glory.

The Obstacle of Grief

            In the last two articles of this series, we explored how Jesus helps us overcome sin and get our priorities straight so we can be at Home with God this Christmas.  Another obstacle that keeps us from saying, “I’ll be Home for Christmas” is grief.  Losing someone who is dear to you is traumatic.  Some have said it is like having one of your limbs cut off.  You may “get on” with life, but you may never fully “get over” your loss because your life has changed forever. 

Christmas can be especially difficult for those who have lost loved ones.  People often feel guilty because everyone says they are supposed to feel happy at Christmas, but instead they feel sad and lonely.

Don’t ever let anyone tell you how you should feel.  There is no right or wrong way to feel.  You can’t control the way you feel.  You just feel the way you feel.  And everybody grieves in their own unique way.  Some people who grieve are dramatic and tearful.  Some are very reserved.  Some people grieve for a long time and some seem to work through their grief quickly.  We must be patient with ourselves and others as we grieve.

Grief is important and necessary.  Psychologist tell us that people who repress their grief find it will eventually bubble to the surface latter on—even if it’s ten years down the road.  It’s important to participate in the process of grief so it doesn’t cause problems latter in life.  Even Jesus—the son of God—grieved.  The shortest verse in the Bible is John 11:34, “Jesus wept.”  He wept because his dear friend Lazarus died.  He grieved, even though Jesus knew he would raise him back to life in just a few moments.

One of the beautiful things about Christmas is that it reminds us that God cares about us.  In Jesus Christ, God wrapped our injured flesh around His Holy Spirit and became one of us.  He walked a mile in our shoes.  His name is Emmanuel—God living with us.  He is with us in the happy times and the sad times.  God is with us in our grief.  Because of Christmas, we never have to be alone—even when we feel alone.

And because Jesus was born on Christmas our grief will not last forever, but only for a season.  Even if our grief lasts until we take our final breath, it will not last beyond the grave.  For at death, we are liberated from the pain and suffering of this world.  In heaven, there is no more night and no more pain.  The only tears shed in our Heavenly Home are tears of joy.  Indeed, many of the people we grieve for in this life are at Home with God in Heaven this very moment!  They are experiencing the ultimate reality of the hope and joy and peace and love we pray for and long for and sing about and celebrate at Christmas time!

I think Richard Lewis Detrich says it best in his book How to Recover from Grief.  He says:

Over the years we’ve created a highly commercialized cultural myth that Christmas is a time of happiness, good cheer, family, and friends.  We feel guilty, upset, and cheated if, because of grief, we don’t experience the orgasm of happiness that seems to be expected.  But Christmas is, after all, a time of holy days and not a happy daze.  The meaning of Christmas is in the event, in the coming of Christ into our world and into our lives.  Focus on that event.  Christ wasn’t born at a party or even a family reunion but in a stable, with few other people around.  Planning ahead and focusing on the meaning of Christmas will help you through this difficult time.[i]

            The Home God invites us to is a place where tears are welcome.  You don’t have to act as if you don’t feel sad.  You don’t have to feel guilty for your sorrow.  When no one else understands, God understands your pain—He has lived it; He is with you as you go through it. 

God’s Home is not a commercialized fantasy

where everything is happy, happy, happy. 

God’s Home is a reality that deals candidly

with real pain and ultimately overcomes it.

Conclusion

            Because Jesus, the word of God, became flesh and lived among us, he understands the struggles we face that make being Home for Christmas difficult.  But because Jesus is the Son of God, He has the power to overcome any obstacle that threatens to separate us from God. 

            What keeps you from being at Home with God?  Is it sin? Are you too busy?  Are you weighed down by a load of grief?  Jesus understands your struggles and he has made a way for you to come Home.  Do you hear him calling for you today?  He is calling you Home.  Will you accept his invitation?  Will you come Home for Christmas this year? 

Gracious Heavenly Father,

            Thank You for inviting us Home for Christmas.  Help us to be faithful as we take up our cross and follow Jesus on the road that leads us Home.  In Jesus name we pray.  Amen.

---

[i] Richard Lewis Detrich and Nicola J. Steele; How to Recover from Grief; revised edition; page 23

Why are We Giving Away a TV at Church?

"But his father said to the servants, ‘Quick! Bring the finest robe in the house and put it on him. Get a ring for his finger and sandals for his feet." Luke 15:22

God gives extravagantly. 
When we deserve only reproach and punishment, God forgives and showers us with love.  His love is extravagant and it doesn't make sense! But I'm glad He gives extravagantly.

God’s extravagant giving inspires us to give. This is why we give gifts at Christmas. Even though it is Jesus' birthday, we give gifts to each other because God gave an extrordinary gift to us--His Son.

This month we are giving away extravagant gifts at Pleasant Grove United Methodist Church in Dalton.  In addition to tons of other cool gifts, we will give away a Samsung Galaxy Tab, a Fitbit, and a 42 inch Sanyo TV.

What! Has the church lost it's mind and

been swallowed up in the world's materialism? Absolutely not!
However, God has blessed us beyond all reason and measure with His extravagant love and blessings.  So, we want to turn around and give extravagantly to others the way God gave to us.  That is why we give to the needy all year long through DOCUP and Family Promise and Be the Church and missionaries and many other outreach efforts. And that is why we are giving you a chance to receive a fabulous Christmas gift from the church each Sunday this month.

So come and bring as many friends as you can! Because you might just find the most extravagant gift of all--eternal life through a personal relationship with Jesus Christ.