The Seventh Commandment - Adultery

Exodus 20:14

Introduction

            The Ten Commandments were written on stone tablets by the very finger of God.  They were the general rules God gave the Israelites about how to be civilized as the newly formed community of God’s people.  Today, they continue to instruct us on how to live godly lives as a community of faith, enjoying the blessings of God’s people.  They also show us how we fall short and need God’s grace and forgiveness.  Do you know the Ten Commandments?  Can you fill in the blanks in the list below?            

The Ten Commandments:

1.     Do not _______ any God except the Lord.

2.     Do not ____ _____ of any kind.

3.     Do not ______ the ____ of the Lord.

4.     Remember to _______ the _______ ___ and keep it holy.

5.     Honor your ______ and ______.

6.     Do not ______.

7.     Do not commit ________.

8.     Do not _____.

9.     Do not _______ _______ against your neighbor.

10.  Do not _____.

How did you do?  Keep working on it until you have the Ten Commandments memorized. 

Today we will look at the Seventh Commandment as found in Exodus 20:14

¹⁴ “You must not commit adultery.”

 

It was about nine o’clock at night. A man dashed into the doctor’s office full of anxiety.  He explained to the doctor that he’d been a nervous wreck all day. The doctor, in his best professional manner, asked if anything had happened to upset him. "Well," the man answered, "there is this letter I received this morning." He showed the doctor a letter, which stated in part, "If you don’t stop running around with my wife, I’m going to blow your head off." The doctor answered, "Well, that’s a fairly simple matter. Why don’t you just stop running around with the man’s wife?”  "But, Doctor, the fool forgot to sign his name!"[i]

            Google defines adultery as voluntary sexual intercourse between a married person and a person who is not his or her spouse.  Sex is a wonderful and powerful gift God gave His creation.  For humanity, it is meant to be enjoyed between a husband and wife within the safe bonds of a committed marriage relationship.  Sex within marriage is very good.  Besides the practical purpose of creating children, sexual union can be a deeply pleasurable experience that cements the bonds of intimacy between a husband and a wife.  In both the Old and New testaments, the Bible indicates sex is a way for two persons to become one.[ii] 

            Genesis 2:1 talks about the marriage union between a husband and wife.  It says, “…a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.”  It is a beautiful mystery how God can take a man and a woman and knit them together as one.  Often when I perform a wedding ceremony, couples will light a unity candle to symbolize this sacred union.  The flames of two separate candles are used to light one single flame, symbolizing the uniting of two people into one.  Once the flames of the two candles unite, they cannot be separated.  The light of the candles is combined; the chemical reactions of the flame are comingled.  It would be impossible to divide up the flames once united.  Even if you parted the flames into two separate candles again, each separate flame would contain elements of the other flame.  That is why divorce is so difficult and why Jesus cautioned against it.  You can never truly separate fully from your spouse—parts of them will always be comingled with you.  And sex is an important tool God gave a husband and wife to impart this beautiful and mysterious union.

            But like a river that leaves its banks and brings a devastating flood, sex becomes highly destructive when it leaves the safe boundaries of marriage.  When a spouse commits adultery, they unite themselves with another person besides their spouse.  Now dangerously outside the will of God, they have polluted their body and their marriage.  They have comingled with another outside of God’s plan.  Even if one spouse does not know that the other has cheated, there are now destructive forces loose in the marriage that will cause all kinds of damage to the unity of husband and wife.  Even in Old Testament times—when polygamous marriages with multiple wives and mistresses were common—it was the cause for great trouble and strife.  Why?  Because this is not God’s plan.  You don’t believe me?  Read in your Bible about some of those dysfunctional marriages.  Read about Abraham’s screwed up marriage to Sara and his mistress Hagar.  Read about Jacob and his two jealous wives Rachel and Leah.  Read about the downfall of wisest king in all history—Solomon—who was brought down and strayed from God because of his many wives and concubines.  Adultery will tear you apart, not to mention the destruction it will wreak on your spouse, your children, your family and friends, and even the person with whom you commit adultery.

More Than Just Sex

Somehow, I think everyone knows we should not commit adultery.  And yet surveys show that about 22% of married men and 14% of married women confidentially admit that they have strayed at least once in their marriage.  But…

Adultery is more than just sex.  Obviously, if you look at the statistics, you will notice men are more likely to cheat than women.  This may be because studies show men, in general, find the appeal of a physical, sexual affair more appealing than women.  On the other hand, women are generally more attracted by emotional stimuli.  When a woman cheats, it tends to be more about an emotional bond with another person.  Women tend to go for emotional affairs while men go more for a physical affair.

Whether you are a man or a woman, I must warn you that you can be involved in an emotional affair without ever having “sex.”  An emotional affair is when you bond emotionally with another person other than your spouse—especially a person of the opposite sex—in a way that should be reserved only for your spouse.  WebMD offers 7 signs you may have crossed the line into an emotional affair:[iii]

1.     You spend a lot of emotional energy on the person. “You end up sharing stuff that you don’t even share with your [spouse]--hopes and dreams, things that would actually connect you to your partner.”

2.     You dress up for that person.

3.     You make a point to find ways to spend time together, and that time becomes very important to you.

4.     You’d feel guilty if your [spouse] saw you together; you are doing things and saying things that you would never do or say in front of your spouse.

5.     You share your feelings of marital dissatisfaction.

6.     You’re keeping secret the amount of time you’re spending with the person (including emailing, calling, texting).

7.     You start to feel dependent on the emotional high that comes with the relationship.

You see, you can “commit adultery” without ever having sex.  Emotional adultery may be just dangerous as a sexual fling because it is driven by emotional bonds that are reserved only for one’s spouse.  Whether you are involved in a sexual affair or an emotional affair, I urge you in the name of the Lord to stop now!  Come talk with me about it so we can pray together and ask God to help you and begin the process of healing and accountability. 

Jesus’ Teaching about the Seventh Commandment

            But perhaps the most dangerous form of adultery today is adultery of the eyes.  Sex appeal is a powerful force that can be wielded to manipulate.  Our culture uses sex to sell everything from music to prescription drugs to hamburgers.  It is impossible to live in America without being inundated with sexualized images.

            In Matthew 5:27-28, Jesus said, ²⁷ “You have heard the commandment that says, ‘You must not commit adultery.’ ²⁸ But I say, anyone who even looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”

You cannot live in our country without seeing sexual images.  But as I think I heard Sara Brooker say once, “You can stop a bird from landing on your head, but you don’t have to let it make a nest there.”  We can’t help but see tempting sexual images, sexy women, or attractive men, but we don’t have to look twice or fantasize about them.  And yet that’s what most of us do.

The porn industry in the United States generates $13 billion every year.  Since the beginning of 2015, there have been over 1.3 billion internet searches for pornography.  64% of Christian Men and 15% of Christian women say they watch porn at least once per month.  It is no wonder that our ideas about sexuality, marriage, and homosexuality are so off track in America today.)  If you are looking at porn or lusting after women (or men), I urge you in the name of the Lord to stop now!  Come talk with me about it so we can pray together to ask God to help you and begin the process of healing and accountability. 

Invitation

            Clearly, we are an adulterous people according to Christ who said, “…anyone who looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”  So none of us can boast we are without sin.  Nor should we lie to ourselves and others that we are not as bad as some.  “For,” as James 2:10 says, “the person who keeps all of the laws except one is as guilty as a person who has broken all of God’s laws.”  The Commandments and Jesus’ words prove that we are and adulterous people who desperately need God’s grace and forgiveness.

Sometimes in the church, we like to point the finger at others and say, “They are what’s wrong with the world.”  It feels so much better to point the finger at someone else.  Then we don’t have to look uncomfortably at our own failings.  The Truth is, we are what’s wrong with the world.  We are full of sin.  We need God’s grace and forgiveness.  We are in desperate need of God’s healing.  And lest we ever forget it, the Lord and His Commandments remind us.

That is the Bad News.  But the Good News is that Jesus didn’t come to condemn us.  Jesus came to save us.  For 1 John 1:9 says, "...if we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness."  Isn't it Good News to know Jesus will forgive us and wash us clean if we ask?

Won’t you come to the Lord today and ask His forgiveness.  Won’t you beg Him to wash you clean.  Won’t you let Him begin to heal your heart today.  Won’t you turn away from your sin and turn to the one who can fulfill your every need and desire.  Come to Jesus today.  He is your only hope.

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[i] http://www.sermoncentral.com/sermons/no-adultery-joe-bedy-sermon-on-commandments-adultery-51518.asp

[ii] Genesis 2:24, 1 Corinthians 6:15

[iii] http://www.webmd.com/sex-relationships/features/emotional-cheating-guilty

The Sixth Commandment

Exodus 20:13

Introduction

            Today, We'll get back on track with the 10 commandments after being on a a break for the past few weeks.  We've already covered commandments 1-5; over the next 5 weeks we will look at 6-10.  I had to giggle as I was preparing because school starts back Friday in Whitfield County, GA and the commandment today says do not murder!  So teachers (and students), remember that this school year!
             I challenge you to memorize all 10 commandments this summer.  How many of the commandments can you name by memory so far.  Here's the whole list:           

The Ten Commandments:

1.     Do not worship any God except the Lord.

2.     Do not make idols of any kind.

3.     Do not misuse the name of the Lord.

4.     Remember to observe the Sabbath Day and keep it holy.

5.     Honor your father and mother.

6.     Do not murder.

7.     Do not commit adultery

8.     Do not steal.

9.     Do not testify falsely against your neighbor.

10.  Do not covet.

Today we will look at the Sixth Commandment as found in Exodus 20:13

¹³ “You must not murder.” 

What is Murder?

            The commandment says, “Do not murder,” and everyone knows that.  Almost every culture throughout history has inherently understood that murder was unacceptable.  Do we really need to be told?  I think everyone can agree you should not murder.  But what is murder?  The Bible also teaches that murderers should be put to death.  Wouldn’t killing a murderer also be murder?  And what about warfare?  Isn’t a soldier sometimes required to kill in the midst of the battle?  Is  that murder?

            Merriam Webster defines murder as “the crime of unlawfully killing a person especially with malice aforethought.”  The online encyclopedia, Wikipedia, goes on to elaborate, “Murder is the killing of another person without justification or valid excuse, and it is especially the unlawful killing of another person with malice aforethought.”

            So there seems to be some circumstances that justify the killing of another human being.  The Law of God in the Old Testament spells out some circumstances where killing are justified.  For instance, Exodus 22:2 says, “If a thief is caught in the act of breaking into a house and is struck and killed in the process, the person who killed the thief is not guilty of murder.”  This biblical idea goes along with our modern idea of justifiable homicide, also known as self-defense.  In other words, if someone is attacking you and posing an imminent danger to your life or limb, you may be justified in taking their life in order to protect your own.  That would not be considered murder, but reasonable self-defense.

            In other places in the Bible, God clearly commands soldiers to attack a city or to defend a city during times of warfare and killing is an inevitable part of warfare.  Yet this is not considered murder.  This biblical concept as part of our understanding of the rules of modern warfare; the killing of enemy combatants during warfare according to the rules of war is not considered murder.

            Furthermore, capital punishment—taking the life of someone who has been convicted of a serious crime—is also part of God’s law in the Old Testament.  Such punishments would not be considered “murder” as they are justified by God’s law.  There is much debate about whether capital punishment is acceptable in our world today, but the prevailing thought in America at this time is that execution for convicted criminals is not murder.  It would be considered by law a justification or valid excuse for taking another person’s life.  (Keep in mind, capital punishment is not a punishment an individual meets out on a criminal; it is applied by the state and only after a fair trial and conviction followed by numerous possibilities for appeal by the criminal.)

            Now, I am not a lawyer and my goal today is not to clarify all the inner workings of America's legal system.  I’m simply trying to dig down to a clearer understanding of what murder is.  Murder is willingly and with the deliberate intent to do evil, killing another person unlawfully.  And I think almost everyone can agree murder is wrong. 

Jesus’ Teaching on Murder

            As I have said in previous sermons, the Ten Commandments teach us basic rules for living a good and pure life that is pleasing to God.  However, they do more than just that.  The Commandments also show us how we fail to live justly and thus desperately need God’s grace and forgiveness throughout our life.  And yet some will come to the Sixth Commandment and try to hang on to traces of self-righteousness.  We might try to justify ourself and say, “Yes, it is true that I have not always put God first in my life (so I have broken the First Commandment).  I may have broken other commandments too, but at least I am not a murderer.” 

The implication of this kind of thinking is that we might be bad, but we’re not that bad and God should cut us some slack.  This kind of thinking ignores James 2:10, which says, “For the person who keeps all of the laws except one is as guilty as a person who has broken all of God’s laws.”  However, in our human thinking we still try to justify ourselves and make levels of righteousness. 

I think it is helpful to hear what Jesus taught in regards to the Sixth Commandment about murder.  In Matthew 5:21-22, Jesus said, “You have heard that our ancestors were told, ‘You must not murder. If you commit murder, you are subject to judgment.’ But I say, if you are even angry with someone, you are subject to judgment! If you call someone an idiot, you are in danger of being brought before the court. And if you curse someone, you are in danger of the fires of hell.”

            You see, Jesus is the fulfillment of the Commandments.  His role is never to point out just how far we can go and still get away with “murder.”  Jesus challenges us to live up completely to God’s standards and realize it is impossible.  (For is there really anyone among us who has not become angry with another person?  Is there any among us who has not called someone an idiot (or had a similar thought in our heart)?  There are few—if any—who have not done all of these or worse at some point in our life.)  And Jesus points out—rightly so—that if you have not been completely perfect, as he is completely perfect, you have fallen short.  You are guilty.  You deserve punishment.  You are not worthy of God’s glory.  You have no right to put yourself above anyone else.  We are all sinners.  We are all in the same boat—in desperate need of God’s forgiveness and grace.  Therefore, let us get rid of any notion in our heart that we are good, or “not that bad” or at least “not as bad as some.”  We are all just sinners.  Period. 

The Good News

            Jesus points out that we are sinners.  His perfection illuminates our imperfection.  His purity, our impurity.  But that is not Jesus’ whole purpose.  He did not come to condemn us, but to save us.  He points out our failings only so we will cry out for grace and take hold of his salvation.  The bad news of our sinfulness draws our attention to the Good News of God’s forgiveness in Christ. 

            So Christ comes to us today and he challenges us to see our sin and desperate need of God’s grace and forgiveness.  And Christ himself, offers us God’s grace.  It was purchased by his death on the cross.  Though we were the ones who deserved death, he paid the price for us.  Will you accept his gift?  Will you cry out to God and say, “I am sorry for my sins!  Please forgive me!  Wash me clean and make me new!”  Perhaps that is why God brought you here today. 

            Perhaps you would like to pause for a moment of silent prayer so you can confess your sin and ask God’s forgiveness.  Then, let me offer my own prayer on our behalf. 

Silent prayer…

Directed prayer:

            “Father God in Heaven, please forgive us of our sins.  We know we have failed to live the way you asked—sometimes by what we have done wrong and sometimes because of the right things we have failed to do.  Forgive us for breaking your commandments.  Through Your grace, help us to begin today to be your people by following Your son Jesus, learning his teachings, and living like him as best we can.  Amen.”

Christmas in July

Disturbed, Disinterested, or Devoted
Matthew2:1-12

Introduction
            Sometimes we get so busy in the Christmas season it’s hard to actually enjoy Christmas.  That's why I want to look at the Christmas story in July.  Maybe now, in the middle of summer, you may see/hear Christmas a little differently.
            Last Christmas, I was studying and preparing for a sermon, when I discovered a fascinating insight in William Barclay’s commentary on the Gospel of Matthew.  It did not go with my message at the time, but I set the idea aside specifically for “Christmas in July.”  So this message has been over 8 months in the making and you are reading it today for a reason.  I pray you will listen to what the Lord is saying specifically to you. 

Matthew 2:1-12

2 Jesus was born in Bethlehem in Judea, during the reign of King Herod. About that time some wise men from eastern lands arrived in Jerusalem, asking, ² “Where is the newborn king of the Jews? We saw his star as it rose, and we have come to worship him.”

³ King Herod was deeply disturbed when he heard this, as was everyone in Jerusalem. ⁴ He called a meeting of the leading priests and teachers of religious law and asked, “Where is the Messiah supposed to be born?”

⁵ “In Bethlehem in Judea,” they said, “for this is what the prophet wrote:

⁶ ‘And you, O Bethlehem in the land of Judah,
    are not least among the ruling cities of Judah,
for a ruler will come from you
    who will be the shepherd for my people Israel.’”

⁷ Then Herod called for a private meeting with the wise men, and he learned from them the time when the star first appeared. ⁸ Then he told them, “Go to Bethlehem and search carefully for the child. And when you find him, come back and tell me so that I can go and worship him, too!”

⁹ After this interview the wise men went their way. And the star they had seen in the east guided them to Bethlehem. It went ahead of them and stopped over the place where the child was. ¹⁰ When they saw the star, they were filled with joy! ¹¹ They entered the house and saw the child with his mother, Mary, and they bowed down and worshiped him. Then they opened their treasure chests and gave him gifts of gold, frankincense, and myrrh.

¹² When it was time to leave, they returned to their own country by another route, for God had warned them in a dream not to return to Herod.

An Outsider’s View

            Sometimes it takes an outsider to see something everyone else takes for granted.  The Wisemen in our story were outsiders to the Holy Land.  Also known as Magi, these men were probably astrologers from what is now modern day Iran.  They spent their life studying the stars and planets for omens to predict important events on earth.  The Wisemen saw something so phenomenal it inspired them to take a journey of thousands of miles on foot (or camel).  It would have taken months to make the trip to see the child they believed was born King of the Jews. It would have required numerous stops along the way for rest, resupply, bathroom breaks, and maintenance (you know you have to change the oil in the camel every three months!).  All this for a “King” you never met before, but only read about in the stars.  How far would you go to meet Jesus?  Obviously, the Wisemen had high hopes for this new king.

            By the time they arrived in Jerusalem, the Wisemen expected everyone to know about the momentous birth of their “New King.”  And yet, no one seems to know anything about Jesus.  And as the Wisemen tell what they have seen in the stars, the people in the story soon gather into three different groups according to how they respond to the news of Jesus birth.  And ever since Jesus came, people have found themselves in the same three groups according to how they react to Christ--people are either disturbed, disinterested, or deeply devoted. 

Deeply Disturbed

            Some people—like King Herod—are deeply disturbed by Christ because they fear he might interfere with their life.  So they seek to silence or destroy Christ.  King Herod was a ruthless ruler who held onto his power despite the highly fragile political realities in which he governed.  The Roman Empire had conquered Judea, but allowed King Herod to rule autonomously—as long as he remained loyal and kept the volatile people of his kingdom in check.  Herod faced threats from outside from the Roman authorities who could depose him at any time as well as threats from within from political opponents, as well as violent extremists and religious fanatics who rejected Herod’s legitimacy to rule.  Herod maintained his power for decades, despite these obstacles, by ruling with an iron fist.  Not knowing who he could trust, Herod became paranoid that everyone was out to get him.  So he disposed of anyone who made him feel vulnerable or threatened.  The list of people Herod murdered to maintain his power included his wife, his mother-in-law, his eldest son, and two of his other sons.  The Roman Emperor, Augustus, remarked bitterly that it was safer to be Herod’s pig than his son.[i]

            Can you imagine how an insanely suspicious and murderous king like Herod would receive the Wisemen’s news that a “new” King of the Jews had been born?  He was deeply disturbed.  “Herod was afraid that this little child would interfere with his life, his place, his power, his influence, and therefore his first instinct was to destroy him.”[ii]

            William Barclay writes in his commentary on this passage, “There are still those who would gladly destroy Jesus Christ, because they see in him the one who interferes with their lives.  They wish to do what they like, and Jesus will not let them do what they like; and so they would kill him.  The man whose one desire is to do what he likes has never any use for Jesus Christ.  The Christian is the man who has ceased to do what he likes, and has dedicated his life to do as Christ likes.”[iii]

            There is a loud voice crying out in our world today that says we deserve to live as we please—that we have the right to satisfy our desire—even if it goes against God’s Word and natural design.  The same misguided voice proclaims that to deny ourselves is unhealthy, a denial of our individuality, and to be inauthentic and untrue to ourselves.  But Christ says, “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me.” In time, as Christ heals our selfish hearts, we may find that we come to love to do what Christ likes.  But it is often not so in the beginning.

            You may be disturbed by Christ because you fear he will interfere with your life.  Are you going to embrace him and let him change you, or are you going to try to destroy and silence him? 

Deeply Disinterested

            Some people are disinterested in Jesus; they don’t care one way or another.  The scribes and chief priests were so engrossed in their politics, their “religious” rituals, and their legal disputes, that they completely disregarded Jesus.  He meant nothing to him—except only to the extent that news of Christ’s birth disturbed their king Herod’s fragile personality which in turn disrupted their own status quo.

            Again, Barclay writes, “There are still those who are so interested in their own affairs that Jesus Christ means nothing to them.”[iv]  There are many who think, “Who has time to worry about ‘religion?’  I don’t need Jesus.  I can do just fine on my own.  I’ll leave all that spiritual nonsense to the religious fanatics, the poor, and the uneducated.  I don’t have time for it.”

            Sadly, it often is not until same terrible tragedy comes in a person’s life that they will become interested in Jesus.  When cancer strikes or a love one dies unexpectedly, then suddenly people begin to cry out to a God they had little interest in before.

            I am a kind person, but I find myself in a strange place sometimes—praying for people who are deeply disinterested in Jesus.  Sometimes I must pray for God to send trials and tribulations that are trying enough to shake people out of their apathy so they will become interested in Jesus before it is too late.

            Are you one of these disinterested people?  What will it take to wake you from your spiritual slumber so you recognize your deep need for the love and power of Christ?  I pray it will not take some terrible tragedy.  Why not turn your thoughts and interests to him today? 

Deeply Devoted

            And finally, there is a third group—those who are deeply devoted to Christ.  Barclay wrote, “There was the reaction of the wise men, the reaction of adoring worship, the desire to lay at the feet of Jesus Christ the noblest gifts which they could bring.  Surely, when any man realizes the love of God in Jesus Christ, he, too, should be lost in wonder, love, and praise.”

            The Wisemen followed the star to the ends of the earth to find the King of kings.  How far are you willing to go?  The Good News is, you don’t have to go far.  Jesus is right here, right now.  He ordained this day long ago as the day you would have the opportunity to bow down and worship Christ—to decide in your heart, “I want to dedicate my life to following Christ—to go where he leads me, to do what he wants of me.” 

Invitation

            The Wisemen presented gifts of gold, frankincense, and myrrh.  But what Christ wants from you is your heart.  Which type of person are you today?  As you react to Jesus, are you deeply disturbed, deeply disinterested, or deeply devoted?  Now is the time to decide.  Now is the time to respond.

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[i] William Barclay – The Daily Study Bible Series, the Gospel of Matthew Volume 1, revised edition; page 29

[ii] Ibid.; page 30

[iii] Ibid.; page 30

[iv] Ibid.; page 30

Guest Blog - 6 Steps to be a Cool Christian

While I was out of town on vacation, Pleasant Grove's totally awesome music minister, David Crawford, preached about how to be a cool Christian.  He graciously agreed to let me share his message on my blog today.  Enjoy!

Romans 12:2 - Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is--his good, pleasing and perfect will.

When I read this it makes me wonder about how we “fit in” with society. I mean if we are to have enough influence to persuade someone that they should give their life to Christ, then surely they must respect us as a member of society, or at least their social circle. And our influence within society, or our social circle, will be greater if we don’t appear to be strange, odd, out of sorts with reality, or lost in space. I would think we need to have a modicum of normality, and perhaps even a bit of “cool” if we are to persuade someone else they would benefit from being more like us with regard to living out our Christian beliefs. So, can one be cool and Christian at the same time?

If not sooner, then usually by middle school, we all start noticing where we fit in socially, and most of us would like for the people we are around to think that we are “cool”. We want to fit in, and be accepted. And while the awkwardness of adolescence and our mission to be popular or cool doesn’t last forever, we always want others to respect who we are and what we are striving to be. While it may not be our main focus, even now, we want those with whom we associate to think we are cool. So how do we reconcile being cool, with being a Christian? Are they at odds with one another?
So, naturally the first thing I did was go to Google and type in “Cool Christians.” And one of the search results that caught my eye was something called “Hipster Christians” and I was intrigued. The “Hipster Christian” churches actually have a checklist you can follow to make sure you are staying cool while practicing your faith and here are some of the items that made the list:

• Get the church involved in social justice and creation care. (Okay, I’m down with that)
• Show clips from R-rated Coen Brothers films (e.g., No Country for Old Men, Fargo) during services. (Hmmm)
• Sponsor church outings….(sounds good) to microbreweries……(really?)
• Put a worship pastor onstage decked in clothes from American Apparel.
• Print bulletins only on recycled cardstock. (Ehh, yeah I guess, that’s better)
• Use Helvetica fonts as much as possible. (I had know idea I was such a rebel)

This wasn’t exactly the direction I felt pulled in, so I abandoned the hipster Christian train and searched, instead, for how to be cool. I wanted to see what a secular site had to say about how to be cool.

I found a wiki (I feel cool just saying the word "wiki") on how to be cool in school, and I thought I’d see if their advice was reconcilable with my Christian beliefs and ideals. I picked six of the steps to share with you today. I think you might be surprised, I was.

Secular Coolness Step 1: Don’t just think about it — do it. It’s all very well to read books and blogs about self-improvement, but you have to actually get out there and apply the theories that resonate with you. Let’s replace a few words there and it reads like this instead: It’s all very well to read the Bible, but you have to actually get out there and apply its teachings.

It would appear the first step in being cool within society sounds a lot like verse 20 in the 2nd chapter of James: “But are you willing to recognize, that faith without works is useless?”

Secular Coolness Step 1 continues: Do it! It’s scary but so, invigorating. Who knows who you’ll meet and what they might be able to offer you?

Stepping out can be scary. Expressing your opinion on a subject, especially religion, can open you up to ridicule and you risk a piece of your pride, but it is worth it, and while the first step to secular coolness ends with what you may gain from putting yourself out there, as Christians we must deviate a little from their script and I would challenge you to imagine what the people we share the good news with will gain, and perhaps scariest of all, what the people we do not share the word with may lose.

Thinking things through before jumping the gun is a great trait. But thinking things through and then not doing anything won't get you anywhere.

So the first step in secular coolness is to take action. And a major component of our Christian faith is to take action.

Secular Coolness Step 2: Be yourself. It will be something that other people will look up to. You are unique, and you don't need to join a clique. Make your own friendships.  Don't try to be like anyone else by copying someone else's moves or act. Live life for who you are. Don't lose sight of yourself or your morals. Being cool isn't about changing who you are, its about being confident enough to let people see how awesome you really are.

My dad always said, “Be who you is, ‘cause if you be who you ain’t, then you ain’t who you is.” But sometimes we don’t feel like we are awesome enough to be “cool”. Not a problem, because Psalm 139: 14 and 15 says, "I will give thanks to You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Wonderful are Your works, And my soul knows it very well. 15 My frame was not hidden from You, When I was made in secret, And skillfully wrought in the depths of the earth..."

The article continues by saying, “If you don't let people see the real you, then what's the point? Being able to be yourself and to have people appreciate you is the coolest thing of all.” So let’s play the old word replacement game and say it like this, “If you don’t let people see the real you, and you have been made new in Christ, how will the world see Christ in you and come to know Him as their personal Savior?” 

Secular Coolness Step 3: Speak up. Observe people who are "cool"; they usually speak confidently and clearly, at a good pace. They don't chatter rapidly, pause, say uh, um..., or mumble. They say what they mean, and mean what they say. Be confident in your word and don't let anyone try to change it. If you state your opinion and people disagree, don't worry. Say what you feel and people will respect you for that, unless you say it knowing it will offend someone. Don't shout out your opinion just to be heard. Make sure it's relevant, and be ready to back it up soundly.

If speaking up and speaking confidently is cool, then I believe Paul is one of the coolest people in history, because Colossians 4:3 says, “...praying at the same time for us as well, that God will open up to us a door for the word, so that we may speak forth the mystery of Christ, for which I have also been imprisoned..." Yep, you heard that right, he was in prison for speaking the living word, and while in prison he was praying he would get the chance to speak the word again to someone else who needed to hear it. I also like what the article says about people disagreeing with your opinion: the article says, “don’t worry.” I think sometimes we feel like if we speak about our faith or share the living word, and we are rejected or rebuffed, then somehow we have failed. NOTHING COULD BE FURTHER THAN THE TRUTH. We plant the seed. God makes it grow.

Secular Coolness Step 4: Keep your "cool". The very definition of cool is being calm, composed, under control, not excited, and socially adept. This is especially true right now with so many highly controversial issues blazing through our society. There are people out there who will purposefully try to “get us going” when they find out we are Christians. They try to “set us off” by “setting us up” with questions about these controversial subjects. It is our job to remain calm. Know what we believe and be able to back it up with scripture, doctrine, and our beliefs. It is also ok to admit that we may not have the answer, but we trust in our God and know He is in control. I would say that most, if not all of us, have been fired up by someone pushing the right buttons, but if we can remain cool, it will be more apparent that we have faith in someone bigger and more powerful than all of our problems. And according to Proverbs 15:18, "A hot-tempered man stirs up strife, but the slow to anger calms a dispute."  So there must be something to staying cool. 

Secular Coolness Step 5: Have faith in your friends. There’s a reason they hang around you. The personality traits you may think make you socially awkward, may be the very quirks they find endearing. If you want to be cool, then you have to believe that the people around you genuinely like you and find your relationship meaningful. Remember that it's not cool to hang out with people who you think are cool just because you think it'll make you cool by proxy. Life doesn't work that way.

Another aspect is to consider the people who make up your social and work related circles. We have all been given gifts and abilities that we use to help build God’s kingdom on earth, as well as make a living within our community. Those gifts and interests have drawn you to a certain group of people and similar people are drawn to you because of your gifts and abilities. Contractors don’t always run in the same social circles as ballet companies. Because we are varied in our interests and abilities we have a chance to reach a multitude of people from very diverse social circles. Embrace where you are and look for opportunities within your circle to witness through your actions and when the occasion arises by sharing words of faith. The friends who make up your circle will be there for you. After all, they are your friends.

Jesus said it like this, “Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends. 14 You are my friends if you do what I command. 15 I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you.”

Secular Coolness Step 6: Don't be afraid to be different. Whether that means defending someone else, or taking interest in something that no one else does, like playing an instrument, try to be different and stand out. (16) The coolest people are the ones who occasionally break against the tide and make people question the status quo. Take that last statement and change coolest to Christian. The Christian people are the ones who break against the tide and make people question the status quo. Most of us have been involved in that conversation. You know, the one where everyone seems to be agreed in a course of action, or an opinion is shared by the majority; and then there you go having to interject your Christian morals and beliefs making everyone reevaluate their position. It is not always met with kindness, instead it is usually met with exasperated sighs, but it is the Christian thing to do, AND it is cool when you are part of redirecting a situation onto a Christ-like path.

So, can you be cool and be a Christian? I don’t think you can be a Christian without being cool. One of the online dictionaries defines cool as fashionably attractive or impressive. As I look out on the congregation I don’t think we need to worry about fashion or attractiveness, ya’ll are a pretty good lookin’ bunch. So I think we are talking about cool being impressive. And there’s really no denying Jesus was impressive. He calmed the storms, He turned water into wine, He healed the sick, raised the dead and saved the entire human race. That’s impressive, that’s cool, and that’s who promised to be with us through the gift of the Holy Spirit. We walk with Jesus because we are Christians. Because we are Christians we strive to be like Christ. We are most like Christ when we are least like ourselves and we surrender our body to the will of God. And in those moments we are cool and it is cool. Not because of who we are or what we do, but because of whose we are and what He can do through us for the rest of the world.

How Far I Can Go

Since I didn't preach a sermon at church yesterday, I thought I'd share something I wrote a couple years ago as I was grieving for a family that left my church because they disagreed with the United Methodist Church's stance on homosexuality.  This was what was in my heart and remains on my heart for the family and others like them.

How Far I Can Go

You don't understand how far I would go for you.

I can love you.  I can laugh with you,

cry with you, dance with you.

But I can't call what wrong right for you. 

I can serve you, worship with you, put you to work and work for you.

I could trust you, depend on you,

pray for you, be prayed for by you.

But I can't call what's right wrong for you. 

I could eat with you, sit with you, smile with you,

unite my heart with you, commune with you.

I can study with you, learn with you, teach you and learn from you.

I can lean on you, fight for you, suffer for you and die for you. 

But I can't call what's wrong right for you.

And I won’t call what’s right wrong for you.

You just don't know how far I want go for you,

but I can't call what's wrong right for you. 

I love you too much.